The longer my mother cried, the tighter I held her,
A stillborn child, a lost brother, it still seems a blur.
Buried without a name in the cemetery on the hill.
Never to feel the wind or to have that thrill,
of riding a bike with me through the country side.
Never to see the ocean, the waves or moon at high tide.
I longed for a bother to share life and all it has to offer.
But then again I know were he's at and he did not suffer.
I blamed myself and thought I might have been the cause,
by my actions, until I had time to think and pause.
There were more factors involved than I could perceive.
When things go wrong, how near sighted we can be,
thinking we are always the ones at fault.
One day I will ask God about things that are difficult.
And sit down with my mother and brother to share,
experiences, like caving and a close call with a bear,
and all the other experiences that life gave to me,
There must be a reason he died and not me.